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| It's been almost a year since I've wrote on here...........wow. I officially made it through my freshman year of college....it's over. Thank God it's summer....anyways, this song is amazing...old, but still amazing.
"Outside"
And you
Can bring me to my knees
Again
All the times
That I could beg you please
In vain
All the times
That I felt insecure
For you
And I leave
My burdens at the door
But I'm on the outside
I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside you're ugly
You're ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
All the times
That I felt like this won't end
It's for you
And I taste
What I could never have
It was from you
All the times
That I've cried
My intentions
Full of pride
But I waste
More time than anyone
But I'm on the outside
And I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside you're ugly
You're ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
All the times
That I've cried
All this wasted
It's all inside
And I feel
All this pain
Stuffed it down
It's back again
And I lie
Here in bed
All alone
I can't mend
But I feel
Tomorrow will be OK
But I'm on the outside
And I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside you're ugly
You're ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
i <3 music. i don't have anything else to say..besides, no one reads this anyways. later on
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| sooooooooooooooooooooo wow i was pretty uhh sad last night
right now..the topic of bein done w/ school...feels prettttty good :D .... i can sleeeep!!!!!! lol
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| Sooo..........I know i was excited to get outta school..but all the sudden, like...right now....it's hitting me. High school's over. Forever. I don't get to go back next year. I won't ever see some of these people again. Ever, in my life. Some of my friends are going into the military. Some are going far away. It's just a sad situation.....these last 4 years have honestly flown by. High school seemed hard..it seemed sucky..and I never wanted to wake up in the morning to go. But, right now, it doesn't seem all that bad. Tomorrow's my last day to go to every class and be able to talk to most of the people in there with ease. To see faces that I know so well. To walk down the hallway and say hi to my friends. To sit at lunch and laugh so hard at things I may never hear again. To complain about school, about tests, about homework, about teachers, about annoying people. Sure, I'll do that in college, but it won't be the same. Some of these people I have known since elementary. It's just really, really weird to picture yourself never seeing them again. Maybe I'm overreacting, but it's definitely a possibility...people change. people leave. Not everyone's going to stay in lima for the rest of their lives. Not everyone's going to be the same person after they graduate. High school has been a lot of good times, a lot of memories, and so many laughs and jokes. I have made friends, lost friends, and built stronger bonds with friends. well I guss all i can say is that I can't believe I'm done with high school...ever since I was a freshman I have been saying I couldn't wait to be a senior...well, now it's here...and I'm kinda scared..I guess it's just a stepping stone I have to overcome. anyways..if anyone's reading this.....i love you.haha...unless you're some random stranger.......but seriously, if you're not already graduated or about to......enjoy your last years of high school...because...they go so fast. Live for the moment....not for the past, and not for the future. <3
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| Wow I think that's a record....like 5 months since I updated last..
As of now....I have exactly 3 days of school left.....................of high school.............forever. I can't believe it...but it's so awesome...i've been waiting for this for sooooo long and it's finally here.....i'm kinda scared..but pretty excited.....i think it'll all hit me later when i'm going to college...but right now i'm just ready for SUMMER!
Anyways............a lot has happened, stuff that I'm not gonna remember....Prom was last weekend! It was really fun. my last high school dance ever! Haha. Post-prom was kinda dull..but that's ok. after that I went a few places and yeah it wasn't too bad!!
Right now the weather's all crappy....raining...and cold.......ugh. I hate it. Hmm my cousin Andrew and his wife had a baby, Cooper :) ..haven't gotten to see him though because they live in Maryland. As for the guy thing...............we just won't talk about that. There's been a few, but as of this second, nothing too exciting is happening w/ that. Maybe that'll change tonight...hah....riiiight. Anyways.....................I think I'm out................graduation in two weeks baby! And I'm legal in 17 days 
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| 2005 surveyyy
1) Was 2005 a good year for you? Overall, yeah.
2) What was your favorite moment of the year? oh man...i don't know. it
was probably in the summer...and last night was def. memorable
3) What was your least favorite moment of the year? starting school.
4) Where were you when 2005 began? Doerter's
5) Who were you with? bunch of friends
6) Where will you be when 2005 ends? party
7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends? kim, virginia, john, scott, random people.
8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2005? i don't remember if i made one,but i'm sure i didn't keep it
9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2006? Yes
10) Did you fall in love in 2005? nah
11) Did you breakup with anyone in 2005? yes
12) Did you make any new friends in 2005? sure did
13) What was your favorite month of 2005? probably.....july
14) Did you travel out of the Country in 2005? No
15) How many different states did you travel to in 2005? like...Indiana, Michigan, yep that's probably it.
16) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005? nope
17) Did you miss anybody in the past year? yes...
18) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005? uhh. 40 year old virgin.i guess. i don't really know lol
19) What was your favorite song from 2005? "Fireman" by lil' wayne LOL,
"far away" by nickelback, "miss me baby" by chris cagle, "bless the
broken road" by rascal flatts, "all or nothing" by hit the lights, oh
yea and all the rest of their stuff, senses fail stuff, and all kidns o
other stuff
20)
What was your favorite record from 2005? I don't know, it's not like I buy my own cd's
21) How many concerts did you see in 2005? absolutely none..ugh.
22) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005? no
23) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2005? no
24) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005? o yea u kno me....no
25) How many people have you really been attracted to this year? a ton....
26) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year? possibly
27) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005? hmmm i could
do a lot of these, lets go w/ one that wasn't hurtful, rower's little
story that he had to go to LCC...what a ho.
28) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005? maybe, but never intentionally
29) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005? Yes.
30) How much money did you spend in 2005? alot, but I started saving for my new car so not EVERYTHING..
31) What was your proudest moment of 2005? I have no idea..probably passing pre-cal.
32) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005? well luckily I
can't pick one out.......I think thats good. i really don't know.
33) What was your biggest regret of 2005? falling for someone that i shouldn't have....and paying for it.
34) What are your plans for 2006? GRADUATE high school, turn 18!!!,
start college, find a good yet FUN guy, and have a freakin awesome
year! class of '06 baby were outta there in less than 5
months!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So New Years Eve '05.......was freakin awesome. lets just let that
predict how 2006 is going to be.....awesome....I HOPE!!!! its a year
for a lot of big changes....sooo....here we go. lol...bye! <3
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